Hairy, Hairy Quite Contrary, How Does Your Garden Grow?

 

So the sun is out, the sky is a beautiful blue and we are promised two weeks of delicious sunshine.

We are going to be hotter than Ibiza they say.

Hallebloodylujah.

We are soooooo ready for you.

Well, almost.

You see some of us have grown an entire extra layer of skin and hair to get us through the cold climate that we fondly know as the spring.

Our poor little bods having alternated between our entire winter wardrobe twice, are vowing never to come out again.

The sight of the blue skies spur us into over drive as we realise that Yeti is not the one we need this week.

So for some of us that means a quick trim of the lawn and borders.

What the eye doesn’t see and all that.

And unless you are a seasoned all year round maintenance type, it is likely that the sight of the blue skies will have you running for the nearest razor, wax pot, lawnmower and shears from your archives.

In short, it’s time to run for your lady garden.

And this is the great thing about living in the UK, you never quite know when it’s time.

Surge too early and you get your summer timings mucked up, surge too late and you are so going to be the one in the onesie at the BBQ on the hottest day of the year.

Don’t think we don’t know.

Let’s face it, we have all been that person haven’t we?

Trying to work out the timing of a wax over the summer months is a bit like scheduling a board meeting with participants from 12 different countries.

Because as we well know, once embarking on the rigid schedule of hair removal, we then have to think about when it’s going to grow back.

Wouldn’t do for it to clash with the Queen’s Garden Party after all would it!

So we may just have to factor in a quiet weekend of languishing in private where we pray for our leg lawns to grow just a quarter of an inch so that we can once more be relieved of it.

I have to say there can be advantages to hanging out with anyone 40+ at regrowth times.

I include myself in this category.

This is quite a strategic social move.

On the basis that they can’t read a menu without their own (or someone else’s) glasses, they are unlikely to see your delicate leg lawn cutely peeping out from your pedal pushers.

That is one of my top tips from my Beauty Bible and will ensure you never need miss an event again.

So I’m guessing we are going to fall into two halves here.

Some of us will be ripping off our skater skirts and winter sleeves to reveal our ever-ready bodies whilst others are flicking through the wardrobe for the lightweight trousers and sleeved tops.

Yes we do all have THAT outfit.

Oh how I hope that someone opens a hair removal salon called The Lady Gardener.  Maybe they already have.  It’s certainly there for the taking.  A franchise even or a chain of ‘garden’ centres.

And then there are the borders.  Otherwise known as hands and feet.

And like all good borders, they need a hint of colour.

Now, if we can just flick back to the Beauty Bible, I’m suspecting that if you are anything like me, there is definitely some ‘behind the scenes’ preparation needed.

No point planting flowers among last years foliage eh!

So having shaken off the winter socks and boots, you are highly likely going to have a little extra padding on your little tootsies.

To put it more delicately, if you could exfoliate your entire body with the heel of one foot, then you probably need to brace your little tootsies for the knife and a good grating.

And that is completely bloody normal in my Beauty Bible. 

So what are we waiting for – best foot forward.

IBIZA we are coming for you.

Have fun in the sun.

Nicky x

 

  

 

 

 

 

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